Interview: 100 Women Project

A few months ago I was interviewed by one of my favorite people, Tami Hackbarth for a really special project + I want to share it with you in hopes you'll find some inspiration from our conversation + sign up to be interviewed yourself for the 100 Women Project too!

Happiness isn't walking around blissed out 24/7. It's finding gratitude in the little things, it's being present, it's doing something to connect to yourself (not living in the past or future).

In this interview I share how building in little moments of self-care (doing things that make me feel good + grounded) can be easy + a huge game changer in how you interact with the world + with yourself. 

This is a conversation worth having, whether or not you feel like you're nailing it with self-care, whether or not you're even sure what it means or how it should feel. You can sign up HERE to join Tami's project.

P.S. I'm not always nailing it, I get frazzled, anxious, overwhelmed + pissy. That's OK, those are perfect reminders that I need something I'm not getting. Sometimes I have to give it to myself. Sometimes what I'm not getting is what I'm not giving to those that I love + in giving them time, attention + love, I am able to receive it.

I'd love to hear what you think, <<First Name>>
xo,


100 Women Project Interview (TH is Tami, NS is me) =)


TH - What's your definition of self-care?

NS - Self-care for me is the process of listening to what I need then taking the smallest steps possible to get it. 

TH - Why smallest?

NS - I want it to be easy! And small change is more sustainable.

TH - What types of things do you personally do for self-care?

NS - Meditate, read, yoga, sleep, cook for myself + family, hang out with friends who totally get me and make me feel good, go on walks.

TH - What's the biggest challenge to self-care?

NS - Time. Having a lot of responsibilities to my work, family, taking care of my kid.

Planning so I am not rushing around like crazy.

Delegating some dinners to my husband.

Compromising.

Asking for what I need. Knowing what I need. Communicating what I need.

TH - Dude, me too. All of it.

NS - Riiight?

TH - What is going well in your self-care?

NS - My marriage, my parenting, my morning practices.

TH - These are all going well because of self-care?

NS - 100% attribute the success of everything in my life to self-care.

TH - Me too! I'm so glad we decided to talk because now I see how much more we have in common!

NS - Good thing we get to work together and be friends, huh?

TH - Totally! Last question: What's the hardest part of self-care?

NS - Prioritizing it. As a mom, woman, wife the model we're all fed is to be completely self-sacrificing and it we aren't putting everyone ahead of ourselves we are somehow wrong. 

No, thank you.

TH: Co-sign all of that!

NS: The other part is starting. Fear of old stories... and then there is oh my god, what if this actually works?!

I think we all make things way harder than they have to be. Myself included. 

We can just give ourselves an out and start today.

TH - What do you mean? 

NS - I mean, we don't have to decide to do something forever because we do it one time. We can try different things and see how they feel. If they suck, we can try different things.

TH - Thank you!

Your turn! 100 Women Project

Fancy dinners + Backyard retreats

I went out to eat last night at this great little spot here in Sacramento + when I left I realized it had all the qualities I want in eating, but also in life.

 

First, it was leisurely, not crowded + not particularly loud. I felt totally comfortable pulling up a seat at the bar, ordering a glass of wine + reading the book I had tucked away in my bag, since I arrived a little early.

 

Second, good company. A chance to chat, visit + catch up.

 

Third, pretty food on normal sized plates. Too often we find ourselves with gigantic food on plates that are bigger than our heads. I actually ordered a few appetizers, both of which were perfect portions + beautiful. If you’ve ever seen the food I post on Instagram, you know how much I like eggs + how pretty the yellow yolk makes the dish looks. I ordered a white corn polenta with a poached egg (!), bright green fava beans + copper colored sautéed mushrooms. It was stunning + tasted delicious.

 

This is the thing about practicing mindfulness, the simplest things can blow you away. I didn’t need a $50 steak or lobster dinner to feel completely luxurious, I just needed a book, good conversation, nice glass of wine + a beautiful meal.

 

Last month my friend, Tami + I hosted another LiveWell Women’s Retreat in Sonoma + since we’ve been back I have found myself recreating the same refueling, relaxing, luxurious feelings in my backyard. A few minutes sitting by the pool in the sun (because I LOVE sitting in the sun), eyes closed or reading + smelling the jasmine…in minutes I feel like I just treated myself to a mini-retreat. (There are a few spots left for theJune retreat - perfect summer trip for you + a girlfriend, mom, daughter or sister)

 

The point being, there are many paths to getting what you want. We tend to assume that having or spending more money is the only road to feeling what we want to feel: nourished, relaxed, luxurious, inspired, adventurous, free. 

 

If you limit your thinking to believe there is only one way of getting what you want, whether that is having a certain amount of money, a certain job, a certain body then you’ll always have that excuse to keep yourself from GETTING WHAT YOU WANT.

Do you want the simple answer to why we don't do the things we know would make us feel good?  We don't believe we can, so all we see in front of us is excuses (time, money, materials or intelligence) rather than possibilities + opportunities. 

How do we start to move away from that tunnel vision?
Be mindful + be creative. 

In Beautiful You I emphasize the power of mindfulness in eating, preparing or plating food (even Chipotle take-out). Treat yourself well. Put your food on a plate, light a candle, eat outside (which I do almost everyday), drink fizzy water from crystal wine glasses, throw some herbs on top of your food, invite your friends over, plant a garden (even a little windowsill one), do it in a way that makes you FEEL GOOD. 

 

This is universal, you can create more peace, more community, more adventure, more creativity in a lot of ways as long as you’re open to seeing them. 
 

What small, simple way can you create some more FEEL GOOD in your day-to-day life? Let me know!

xo,
NIkki

Speaking of practicing more mindfulness: I’ve still got some May Clarity Sessions left for you. They are fun, simple + super convenient for you busy bees + you can save $60 because they are on sale! Yay sales.
 

 

Why I do this every morning

A few weeks ago I thought I was losing my mind. My patience were nowhere to be found, I was not proud of the way I was acting + worst of all I felt like I had no control over it. 

The judgments came creeping in about my ability to be a parent, a wife + a decent human being. I was speed eating, yelling at my kid, complaining that the day wasn’t long enough + instagraming myself to sleep at night.

I found my answer quickly + if you feel like you hit the ground running every morning while your day just gets away from you, you’ll want to hear this.

If you dare, you’ll give this a shot.

For a few days I skipped my morning practice. What is that you ask? 

It’s what I do - and what I have every one of my clients commit to - every morning so that we don’t become lunatic parents, co-workers, partners or humans. We have a little extra fuel in our tanks, we’re actually more effective + productive, we make better food choices for our bodies, we talk less crap to ourselves + we feel more positive + compassionate. 

Start small, make it simple.

The fact that you do something is more important than what you do.

It could be as simple as taking 5 deep breaths when you wake up in the morning. Maybe you spend 2 minutes writing in a gratitude journal or do one yoga pose or if you need to move you could do a few push ups or stretches + then 5 deep breaths. 

The point is to just do it. Try it for a week + see what happens, you can always go back to jumping out of bed at the last second, forgetting to eat breakfast + telling little people to put their shoes on 25 times. 

How do you do it?

Attach it to something you already do

If you’re totally new to this I recommend something as soon as you wake up. 5 deep breaths or your favorite stretch/yoga pose before you get out of bed.

Basically, tack it onto something you are already doing, which is waking up + getting out of bed.

I meditate after I get up, make breakfast + pack lunches. It works for my schedule + everyone knows I’m to be left alone for 10 minutes. 

I know you can do this + I bet it will change the way your day goes. So try it for 5 days + tell me how it goes for you! 

xo, 

Nikki

 


P.S. If you want a little extra motivation to start a morning practice or want some direction + clarity on creating ways to take care of yourself this Spring + Summer, I’m going to be offering Clarity Sessions for the month of May only. It is one session with email follow up for accountability. I can help you tap into the wisdom you already have about what you need + how to get it with tips, practices + exercises along the way. It’s easy + to the point + 

This is for those of you who have a little something you’ve been wanting to focus on, you know you should do it + you also know you’d probably feel really great, but haven’t quite gotten around to it or want some fresh ideas, support + accountability. 

Topic categories include:

  • Morning practice (+/or bedtime practice) - this is life changing you guys + gals!
  • Diet + Nutrition that’s right for you
  • Forgiveness
  • Meditation or Journaling
  • Movement + Exercise
  • Rest + Relaxation (yes moms, it’s possible)

There are only a limited number of spots, you can register + schedule your session HERE, so grab yours today. 

Thai Salad with Sesame-Ginger Dressing

This is a hearty salad + stands up well as a left over making it perfect for lunch or to pack the night before to bring to work. I'll be preparing + serving this on the LiveWell retreat this weekend! 

Dressing:
1/3 Cup olive oil
3 Tbsp. soy sauce or Tamari (or Coconut Aminos for soy-free)
2 Tbsp. raw honey
1 Tbsp. toasted sesame oil
2 Tbsp. rice vinegar
1 Tbsp. water
3 cloves garlic, minced
1 Tbsp. fresh ginger
squeeze of lemon or lime juice

Salad:
1 bunch of kale, chopped
1/2 head of purple cabbage, shredded
1 handful of cilantro
1 carrot, cut into matchsticks or ribbons w/ a veggie peeler
1 bell pepper
3 green onions, chopped
1/4 cup nuts or seeds (I toasted sesame seeds with a little Tamari, cashews or almonds would be good)
avocado to your heart's content

Mix it all up. It looks like a lot of ingredients but it was REALLY simple + quick, especially if you get someone to help with the veggie chopping. There will probably be extra dressing. This salad actually holds up well as a left over because kale + cabbage are so hearty. 

A Whole Bunch of Goodness

Since I last popped in I was, of course, immersed with the Beautiful You Project women, doing a lot of resting (hibernating for Winter, really), plenty of reading, which all led to a burst of creativity in February that led to creating a bunch of gifts for YOU.

There are lots of ways we can stay connected + hang out in the coming months. This year, for me, is about how I can serve you best depending on what you need most right now.

So here is what I've been cooking up...
 

 

We can hang out in person:
LiveWell Women's Retreat - 2 of them



Tami + I are back with not one but 2 yoga + cooking retreats! All the exciting details are at www.livewellwomensretreat.com where you can read about the yoga, the hiking, the cooking + more.
4 days, 3 nights in Sonoma, CA at the lovely Star West Ranch.
April 21-24
June 23-26

Check out the website + if you have any questions don't hesitate to email me. There are a few spots left - is on of them yours?


Beautiful You Project is LIVE in Sacramento!



This project is near + dear to my heart with so much gratitude for the women that made this beautiful community over Facebook for the last year in our online program. I've decided to host monthly Beautiful You Project gatherings live + in person right here in Sacramento for ANY woman who desires a supportive community of women + a conversation about how to live with love, truth + be unapologetically your BEAUTIFUL self. We will meet this coming Tuesday, April 12th @ 7pm. They will be held the 2nd Tuesday of each month in Midtown. Dates + details are HERE.


 

Where you can listen:

A NEW PODCAST


Introducing Pay Attention Podcast!
This is super exciting to share, you're one of the first we're telling because it's been hush-hush for awhile + honestly it's been brewing for 3 years waiting for the right time to emerge. I met one of my dearest soul sisters, Melissa on March 13th, 2013 (3 years ago) as we started our businesses + our friendship. On our friend-iversary (TODAY) this year we are launching our podcast, Pay Attention + cannot wait for you to listen. Each week we talk about what we're paying attention to because we believe that the power of your attention is undeniable in creating a pretty cool life. Check us out on Insta: @payattentionpodcast

 

A NEW MEDITATION

Yoga Nidra Meditation is live on Insight Timer App. 


I created this relaxation guided meditation for Beautiful You Project + now it's being broadcast worldwide on Insight Timer, a free guided meditation app. After only a few days live, it's had over 2,000 plays + almost 100 reviews! It's perfect for going to sleep or taking the edge off after a long day of work, plus, it's only 15 minutes. Can't wait to hear what you think.

Happy Spring!

xo, 

Nikki

Free E-book for the Holidays

You know those tasks that you put off, put off, put off until one day you just do it. Like making a dentist appointment (I went to the dentist last month for the first time in 4 years) or filing all the paperwork or bills stacked on your table.

It weighs on you for days, weeks, months, or in my case with the dentist, 4 years. Then something happens + you just do it. You make the appointment, clean up the paperwork, scrub the shower tile, ask for a raise, go for a walk. Then you feel like a total FOOL for not doing it sooner!

What happens: You got a great idea while you were on your walk, it only took 20 minutes to file all of those papers, the dentist said your teeth look great, you get that raise or you don't but you feel like a stud for asking for what you deserve.

This always feels like a game I'm playing with my mindset. What if I just start? Sometimes you just have to send an email or make a phone call. You free up space in your brain. One less thing to subconsciously stress about. Winning!

It is such a great lesson in mindfulness, how great it feels to have your table or desk free of clutter or to feel like you did something nice for yourself by getting bundled up + going for a walk.

The holidays are a sweet time. They can also be a really busy time, a time that challenges any + all efforts to practice healthy habits. 

I invite you to explore how mindfulness can help. What's weighing on you that will make you feel WAY better once it's taken care of? Maybe it's a messy room or drawer but maybe it's a commitment to giving or resting or nourishing your body. 

Since our first big holiday of this season is here (can you believe it?) I've created Nourished: A Mindful Eating Guide. It's an ebook that you can download by clicking on the title there or in the picture below.


It's my gift to you. It's the thing I've been wanting to do and put off, put off, put off until one day I decided to start without any expectation of the outcome (and certainly no Thanksgiving deadline). As these things go, it was not that hard, grueling work that I thought it might be + that kept me from starting.

There's an important offer at the end...so don't miss it!

In total thankfulness, gratitude + love for sharing this with me, Happy-All-The-Holidays